Sunday, September 30, 2012

Weigh In Day

Weight on Surgery Date: 269.8 lbs.
Weight last week: 215.8
Weight Today: 216.2
Weight loss this Week: +.2 lbs
Weight Loss Total: 54.9 lbs

How frustrating! But I expected it. Taking responsibility in this whole process feels good. It's been a hard few weeks. I've been feeling not really like myself lately. Been overeating, drinking soda, eating fattening/sugary foods and going over calories quite often, even with working out. :( I have been really hating myself the whole time too, chewing the skin around my nails, picking, very anxiety ridden. Ugh. I even saw 220 at one point, so unacceptable!

Started my part time job at Bath & Body Works tonight, had a 2 1/2 hour orientation. Met some very nice ladies and had a general good time, got some nice free products too. :D Can't wait to start.

Not much else going on, still babysitting at the Y on Wednesdays and loving it. Planning on hitting the gym Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday (before babysitting), Thursday and Friday, I'm sure one/two of those days something will come up. 

And def. going to be working every day on eating healthier and better. Working my band. I was actually worried on Saturday morning/afternoon. I had 2 slices of pepperoni pizza/garlic sauce from Papa John's Friday evening for dinner (not the best choice) and woke up with some of the worst heartburn/indigestion ever. I was worried that I did something major to my band, I was worried all day. Ended up getting a Fossil watch for $25, Brian got one for $85 and a wallet. I then got a Coach bag and Coach scarf (yay!). Then we went to the Gap outlet and Brian got a really nice sweater and I got a pair of size XL capri workout pants, they fit amazing! And I've never fit into anything from the Gap, so major NSV. 

Ciao for now!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Just a short update...

I feel like I need a good writing session. I haven't been the best bandster the last few weeks. I'm frustrated with myself, upset, motivated, procrastinating, willpower seems lacking. I don't know what the deal is. It's the food, I'm still getting to the gym quite often, very active. Just been really busy, so feeling a bit overwhelmed doesn't help either.

The eating is bad, especially on the days I truly can not get to the gym or come home and workout. I feel like I've gained and I'm pretty sure my scale will say the same this Sunday, we'll see. I was at 215.2 this past Sunday, which was a .4 gain. That's not as bad as I thought, maybe my metabolism is getting better? Not sure. But the eating is really bad. Truly awful decisions. I'm still making sure to get in my protein/watching calories/sugar and water intake, but a few days I went WAY over my calories of 1200, I like to be less, but it was way above. Ugh! But lately I've been eating WAY too many snacks and eating extra food at work from left over meetings, etc. I don't know why I can't just say no to it. Oh yes, and drinking more and more soda lately. I need  to stop this NOW. I had 2 cans today of diet coke/pepsi and then a diet pepsi at the Y during child watch. So frustrating. I never really drank soda before, I don't know why I am now. I'm pissing myself off. Majorly. 

I need to get this shit under control, or I will not see my goal by December of being under 200 lbs. I need this, I want this, I have to have it. I need to do this, I need to remind myself why I did this, why I'm doing this, why I need these changes in my life, why I need to push forward constantly, no matter how hard it gets. And I can tell when I eat something wrong/fast/too sugary/etc., my body hates it. It's not meant to be. I need to stop these bad lifestyle behaviors stat. 

Had a bit of an issue at work today. We have this lady, I'll call her "Betty", she's 62 I think (or 61). She's always been very negative, very worried all the time, very overwhelming, demanding, rude and deceitful. Unfortunately, I had to work VERY closely with her, we're both secretaries for our department. It sucks. She has her good side, truly, everyone does; however, her bad side far outweighs the good. She's a miserable, nosy, has to be in your business and state her 'opinion' about everything. It's usually non-work related and she will complain to anyone and everyone. Funny thing is, nobody really likes her, because of this bullshit. Well, anyways, I got pulled into a conference room today by my supervisor at 7:45 am and I pretty much knew it was something she said. So, basically she complained to our HR manager that I get in my gym clothes too early. I usually do it 15/20 mins before I leave for the day. I like to be able to get to the gym and get a good workout in. And my HR manager had the nerve to tell my supervisor in the bathroom while they were both urinating (males) at urinals. My supervisor is awesome, he can't stand the petty bullshit either and we just laughed and laughed about her nonsense for about 30 minutes. She's crazy! You do NOT mess with my workout time, you just don't, everyone knows that. So now, according to HR, I can't get dressed until I clock out. Awesome. NOT! Stupid cunt. I can't wait until I leave there or she retires. PARTAY! She also complains about peoples clothes, hair, how "busy" she is (she's not), if someone takes a break, takes too long of a lunch, is in the bathroom too long, leaves early and didn't tell her, travels for business, I mean, it's that ridiculous. I'm over her. Grrr.

Off to finish watching Criminal Minds, reading some magazines, and relaxing.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Weigh In Day

Weight on Surgery Date: 269.8 lbs.
Weight last week: 214.8
Weight Today: 214.8
Weight loss this Week: -0
Weight Loss Total: 55.1 lbs.
No loss, oh well. Need to work harder on myself this week.
Went to Maryland on Saturday to shop. Got breakfast at IHOP, then headed to the Towson Town Center. I bought my love a Fossil watch for his bday (tomorr0w). I got some nail polish and nail stickers from Sephora. Yay! We got some frozen yogurt from Yolavie, yum! Walked around quite a bit, browsed at the Apple store,  got some goodies at the Harry & David store (discounted Root Beer Float moose munch and wasabi peas). Then we went to Baltimore inner harbor to walk around. We got a late lunch at PF Changs, yummy! Got some pork dumplings, egg drop soup (super yum!), and then the Caramel Mango chicken (super yum and super spicy). Very good, highly recommend for a place to eat. Walked around a bit there, saw a 9.11 memorial, pieces of the world trade center and the pentagon on display. Walked around the 3 malls down there, got some color changing polish at Urban Outfitters that I've been wanting. :D Then we headed back to where we were in Towson, went back to the mall and went into the Body Shop for my bean to get his face wash/scrub. Then we went to Trader Joe's to stock up on goodies, yummy!
And home we went. A wonderful day spent with my love.
I think I may have gained a lb. or two, or an inch or something. Just been eating pretty bad lately, not watching sugars or anything except calories. I really have't been paying attention to protein either, not a good step in the direction I want/need to go. I need to get out of this rut fast. Going to zumba tonight 530-630, so that should be good. And probably weights in there too.
Went to a Bridal Show yesterday, won something again, LOVE it! I got a $75 gift card to Legends Bar and Grill on the Pike, yay!  We're also going to be checking out Ceolta's Irish Pub for the reception now, they do not charge a room fee, only charge for the food and I found out that they can customize a menu too based on what you want to pay per person. Yay! The place holds 120 comfortably, so I'm going to make that work somehow, because we are also having a photobooth and a candy buffet for favors. Gotta make this work!
Well, that's all for now, I'm at work. Ciao!

Sunday, September 09, 2012

Weigh In Day

Weight on Surgery Date: 269.8 lbs.
Weight last week: 215.8
Weight Today: 214.8
Weight loss this Week: -1 lb
Weight Loss Total: 55.1 lbs.

Craziness! I really have no idea how I didn't gain or just stay the same. I haven't worked out for about 2 weeks, other than the Day of Caring on Friday through work, did about 4-5 hours of outside work. Got back to zumba and weights today at the gym, kicked my ass. But that's okay. :D

Been feeling great lately, even being sick for about 2 weeks and now I'm afflicted with a horrible yeast infection from my lovely antibiotics. But that's okay, it could be way worse, life in general could be way worse. Just been feeling very blessed lately, for breathe, life, family, friends, love, freedom, sight, sound, smell, touch, opportunities, animals, beauty, smiles, laughter, words, nature and a future. I just feel very blessed. Positive thinking and speaking does wonders. Honest.

I am getting so excited for onederland! I am officially past my 50 % of excessive weight lost. So happy! It was around 218 and I am now 214.8. Woo hoo!

NSV: went to Old Navy yesterday to get a white tank top for underneath a lace top I got for our engagement photos. Found one, size XL for $3.50, score! I then applied to Bath and Body Works (to work on what is called the Floor Set Team, those who set up the new displays, etc), and they require a white shirt and jeans as the attire. So, I also found a really cute and soft 3/4 length white shirt with pockets for $12. Another score! But really?! 2 white shirts in one day? Never in my life would I have done that, let alone, I didn't even bother trying them on, I just grabbed XL's in both and Old Navy tends to run small in clothes up to XXL. And they both fit perfectly. Yay!

I go in on Thursday at 4:30pm to B&BW's for an interview and I guess orientation or something. Not real sure, I was kind of out of it when I scheduled that lol. I'll just show up in attire and hope for the best. If all goes well, I would work Sunday's 5pm-midnight and the occasional Tues/Thurs evenings. I don't really want to work much more than that to be honest, so hopefully that's what this truly is. I still am volunteering for the Child Watch room at the Y, haven't been there but once so far, since being sick for the last 2 weeks, but I plan on being there this Wednesday 530-830. Hope I don't get sick again. : ( Tomorrow the plan is to work 730-4, then zumba 530-630, Tuesday is my allergy injections, so I will probably just do a 30 min kettlebell or try out the demo of Zumba Core on xbox 360, then Wednesday is volunteering, then Thursday is the B&BW's evening, then Friday I will plan on zumba at 430-530. I'm not used to being so involved and so on the go, I get a bit stressed out easier now. :/  I need to work on this, especially if I want kids in the near future.

Anyways, off to paint my nails, watch some tv, read a bit and bed. Ciao!

Sunday, September 02, 2012

Weigh In Day

Weight on Surgery Date: 269.8 lbs.
Weight last week: 220
Weight Today: 215.8
Weight loss this Week: -3.4 lbs.
Weight Loss Total: 54.1 lbs.

Not really sure how this worked itself out, but I'll take it, for now. I've been sick since Tuesday with something, not quite sure what. I woke up with a really bad sore throat, had that all day Tues/Wed. Then Wednesday night/Thursday morning, I got congested, sneezing, coughing, etc. I ended up going to my PCP Friday morning and got Augmentin (an antibiotic), because I was blowing  thick nasty green stuff. Yum! So, needless to say, my extra long weekend has been spent mostly on the couch with tissues, endless water supply, vitamins, yogurt (I tend to get yeast infections), sore throat drops, dayquil and nightquil, my horse pill Augmentin (it's HUGE!), pillow, blanket, fan, magazines, movies, tv, sleep. Good times. Blah. Oh well, I'm dealing. I feel a tiny bit better right now, but the side effect of the pill is giving me diarhea, so that sucks. No pain, just good old fashioned diarhea. Awesome!

So, I haven't been to the gym since last Monday, which sucks and I missed my 2nd day at the Y's child watch room, which sucks. So, maybe somehow I did lose 3.4 lbs, but I doubt it, who knows. I won't continue to question it, just let it be. I also got my TOM about an hour ago, makes my day even more awesome. 

We were gonna head to Kipona/Artsfest, but I'm a bit worried about my lovely side effect acting up while there. Think we're going to get some pizza tonight, and I'm going to eat a slice or two. :D

That's really all for now, back to my movie.